


Contingency Plan

by serenesavagery (windrunnerdreamer)



Series: Adolin Speardancer and Kaladin Kholin [18]
Category: Stormlight Archive - Brandon Sanderson
Genre: Anger, Angst and Feels, Childhood, Cousins, Family Feels, Feels, Gen, Heavy Angst, Philosophy, a buttload of angst more like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:47:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23840305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/windrunnerdreamer/pseuds/serenesavagery
Summary: The first time Jasnah talks to her new cousin, she's fourteen and confused.The first time Kaladin talks to his strange, older cousin, he's three years old and wondering where his baby brother is.
Relationships: Kaladin & Jasnah Kholin, Kaladin & Renarin Kholin, Shallan Davar/Kaladin
Series: Adolin Speardancer and Kaladin Kholin [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1527470
Comments: 16
Kudos: 31





	Contingency Plan

"Renarin! Renarin!" 

_Where did he go?_ Kaladin wonders in worry, running faster on stubby little legs. 

"Renarin!" 

Kaladin can feel tears bubbling their way out of his eyes. 

"Renarin, come out! This isn't funny!" Kaladin yells, running. 

Then he knocks into something and it hurts. 

It hurts and Kaladin blinks, trying hard not to cry as he looks up and sees what hit him. 

It's a _really_ tall girl, who's pretty and blinking at him, and she looks familiar for some reason. 

Jasnah Kholin was allowed to be confused about the mundane. 

Now, she hadn't met her uncle's older son, Kaladin, but she supposed that this was the child, if the way he looks so remarkably like his father is any indication. 

"Kaladin?" She asks, blinking. 

Kaladin only looks ready to cry and Jasnah blinks again, before realizing that this child has been running around and had just knocked into her. 

"Oh. I'm sorry." Jasnah said, before awkwardly bending down and helping the child up. 

"You're _pretty_." Kaladin says in wonder, and Jasnah finds it in herself to smile. 

"Thank you. Now, could you tell me why you were running about?" Jasnah asked, crouching down to his height. 

Kaladin now again looks ready to cry. "Renarin's missing." He says, in a small voice. 

Jasnah bites on her lip. Oh, _storms_. 

"Calm down. When was the last time you saw him?" Jasnah asks calmly, holding Kaladin's face. 

"We were playing catch. Renarin likes chasing after stuff, but then he said he wanted a baby chull and I ran after him, but now he's _hiding_ somewhere!" Kaladin burst out, lip wobbling like he's really about to cry. 

Jasnah swallowed. This child's distress was rather infectious. 

"How about I help you find him, child?" Jasnah asks gently. 

Kaladin widens his eyes. "Really? You'd do that?" He asks, and Jasnah can feel...something. 

She's not sure what, precisely. But it perhaps is something on the lines of endearment. 

And well, she couldn't help it- this child was rather precious. Moreover, he was family. 

"Of course. I'm your family." Jasnah says, smiling. 

Kaladin's eyes are now wider with wonder. "Really?" He asks, voice hushed. 

Jasnah nods. "I'm your cousin." 

Kaladin tilts his head to the side. "You're Uncle Gavilar's daughter?" He then gasps. 

"You're Cousin Jasnah!" He says, like he discovered the most wonderful scientific discovery of all and Jasnah's lips are twitching. 

"How do you know that?" 

Kaladin grins, all childish charm and wonder. "Mama tells me to learn about my family! And she showed me a family tree and there it said that our fathers were brothers!" He babbles, his missing brother now forgotten in the light of discovering family. 

Jasnah is not sure whether she should laugh or remind the child his brother has gone missing. 

"I see." She finally says, blinking. 

Apparently, Kaladin does not need a reminder that his brother is missing because his head then bobs up and he gasps again. "Renarin!" 

"Right. Your brother. Shall we go look for him together?" 

It turned out that Renarin had discovered a rather intriguing axehound pup instead of the baby chull, and Jasnah only watches as Kaladin throws a tantrum about Renarin going missing to Renarin. 

The most amusing part is that Renarin does not even listen to his brother and is busy giggling at the axehound pup. 

Jasnah allows herself to smile, and allows herself to be fond of these innocent children. 

* * *

Kaladin somehow, has found her in a library the next day and Jasnah's even more befuddled at this child. 

"Jasnah!" 

Jasnah stares. Has the child started to...

Has the child seriously _imprinted_ on her? 

"How did you find me?" Jasnah asks, curious. 

Kaladin grins, wide, honest and toothy. "Uncle Gavilar told me!" 

Jasnah blinks. Huh. "Well, why are you here?"

Kaladin climbs precariously to the table in a way that makes Jasnah briefly worried, but he finally sits on the table. "Mama was taking care of Renarin and I didn't want to disturb her. So I thought I'd see you, because Mama wouldn't like it if I was alone by myself." He said, quietly, swinging his legs to and fro. 

Jasnah blinks again. This child...

This child was precocious, there was no denying that. 

"What would you like me to do for you?" Jasnah asks, tilting her head to face the child better. 

Kaladin purses his lips, before shaking his head vehemently. "I'll sit here. And you can read all those heavy books. I'll be quieter than a spren." He said, true to his word.

Jasnah smiles, shaking her head. She knows that Kaladin can be quiet, but she doesn't see why he has to not be entertained, at least a little. Knowledge is rather satisfying after all. "On the contrary, I think I'll read you something, Kaladin. Would you like that?" 

Kaladin widens his eyes. "Really?"

Jasnah chuckles. "Of course, cousin." 

Kaladin smiles and Jasnah swears to herself that anyone who dared ruin that smile would get it from her. 

The child should not have been so excited to hear about the history of Thaylenah, but Kaladin listens with rapt attention and even does not hesitate to pepper her with questions about it.

"So why do they have weird eyebrows?"

Even if they're not the most appropriately related to the subject. 

Jasnah does not help the laughter that involuntarily bubbles itself out of her, before shaking her head and fixing Kaladin with a reproving gaze. "Kaladin, that's not important. What did you learn today?"

Kaladin purses his lips, eyes deep in thought. "Well, we learnt about trade! And why the Thaylens find it useful! And-"

Jasnah listens with fondness swimming in her, as Kaladin excitedly recites what he's learnt today. 

* * *

The first glimpse Jasnah receives of Kaladin's likeness to his father is when Kaladin is four years old and meets his father for the first time. 

And yet, it is also comforting, for through this glimpse Jasnah knows Kaladin will not be the Blackthorn. 

Kaladin hadn't come to the library all day, and Jasnah was starting to like the child's presence, strangely enough.

Something was amiss, Jasnah knew that much. 

"Kaladin? Renarin?" Jasnah calls, worried as she looks for them in the gardens outside their keep. 

It is honestly baffling how attached she's grown to these children but Jasnah wouldn't trade that closeness for anything in the world. 

Kaladin is holding Renarin as the little child...is sobbing and Jasnah widens her eyes. 

"Kaladin?" Jasnah asks softly, coming closer and kneeling to his height. 

"Go away- oh, it's Jasnah." Kaladin says, blinking. 

Jasnah looks at Renarin, who is crying silently. "What happened?" She asks, swallowing. 

Kaladin's blue eyes flare up with anger. But this is an anger that was much softer than the one seen in another identical pair of eyes, an anger that consisted of hurt. " _Father_ came." He all but spat the words out with a venom not seen in most four year old children. 

Jasnah looks at Renarin, lips pursing. 

Dalinar had most likely known of the child's condition, and was most probably not very much eager to meet the child.

Despite how eager little Renarin had been to see his father.

Jasnah only hugs the two of them close, tears for a child forced to grow up sooner than he was supposed to slipping down her cheeks. 

* * *

Kaladin grows, and Jasnah is only worried. 

The innocent child she had sworn to protect with everything she had, was now growing moodier and angrier and honestly...

Jasnah couldn't blame him. 

His moodiness wasn't just a product of adolescence, unfortunately- it would have been so much better if it was. It was a product of severely extenuating circumstances. 

Having a warlord for a father was bad enough, but having a father who only hurt your family? 

Jasnah knows. She knows that her parents think they're being excellent secret holders, but she knows their disagreements, her mother's distress, her father's annoyance and his other mistakes...

She's tried so far to not let Elhokar know, and she's not sure how successful she is on that front. Her brother is severely insecure, for all of his bravado and these uncertainties of her family only serve to enrage her. 

Kaladin's anger is darker, as the years go by, and Jasnah can guess what he is thinking. 

Because she's thought the same, as well. 

_~~Why do I have to look after my family?~~_ Jasnah remembers thinking, as Kaladin speaks of Dalinar with a pronounced resentment. 

_~~Why can't you look after me?~~_ Jasnah remembers thinking, as Kaladin lets Renarin sleep on his lap as they talk late into the night about the foolishness of kings. 

_~~Wny do I have to be strong for you?~~_ Jasnah remembers crying into her sleep one day, as Kaladin trudges to the library with a tired grin, explaining how he had to clean up their keep and fix the chimney, as he explains with a sad smile, that his mother's been crying again. 

Jasnah wonders, why were they all so broken? 

* * *

Kaladin squints at a book of medicine one day, and Jasnah smiles at his futile attempts to decipher it. 

He's all of eleven years old, and Jasnah chuckles as Kaladin becomes increasingly frustrated. 

"Kaladin?"

"I want to know what's in there." Kaladin says, chin stubborn. 

Jasnah laughs, genuinely laughs, and she asks Kaladin to sit on the table while she reads him. 

She watches him in amazement, even as she reads out loud, that he's repeating the names to himself. 

_A man keen to learn?_

Jasnah smirks as an idea pops into her head. 

* * *

Renarin runs happily to Jasnah one day, telling her a tale of how Kaladin taught him to write the glyph for _Honor,_ and Jasnah cannot stop smiling. 

* * *

A girl apparently was remarked to be _'the perfect bride for the prettiest whitespine'_ and had apparently run away crying about a mean boy. 

"Kaladin?" Jasnah asks, fighting the urge to not smile at the unrepentant youngster. 

Kaladin holds his head high and defiant, before folding his arms. "She said Renarin was a weirdo and deserved to be friends with gloomspren." He said, sharply. 

Jasnah shook her head. "I'm not here to reprimand you for that."

Kaladin blinked. "Then?"

"I'm here to reprimand you for sinking to a lesser insult- you could have done better than that. If anything, the girl was a perfect bride for a madman." 

Kaladin grins, even under Jasnah's severe gaze, and Jasnah herself feels approval. 

* * *

The next week, a youngster had apparently told off a noble at a feast by saying that his wife had news for him, only to show him a squealing baby chull. 

The noble had apparently stormed off in anger and embarrassment as the other men had laughed at him. 

"What did he do this time?" Jasnah asks, raising an eyebrow. 

Kaladin shrugged. "He was talking about how the supposedly great Blackthorn had a child weaker than a leaf."

"Better. You should match your wits to that of the specimen in general." 

"What do I do if I don't have a chull?"

"Improvise. Though, I'd strongly refrain from you using your fists." 

Kaladin nodded wisely. 

* * *

One day, Jasnah is surprised to find Kaladin entering the library with red cheeks, holding something behind him as he runs up to her. 

"Have this." He says, voice surprisingly gruff for someone who is twelve, and Jasnah, curious, takes it before widening her eyes. 

On the paper, is a beautifully inscribed glyph pair, depicting _Family_ and _Life_. 

"Kaladin?" 

"It's...uh, your birthday, right?'

Jasnah blinked. She had not expected Kaladin to...well, give her something for it. 

Her father had simply kissed her on the forehead, before leaving for administrative duties, while her mother had written her a beautiful ketek, the paper containing which, still safely pocketed inside, and Elhokar had hugged her, wished her before leaving to observe his father. 

"How did you-"

Kaladin shrugged. "It's not difficult. I've been wishing you for your birthday for the past five years or so. So I thought I'd surprise you." He admitted, sitting up on the table and looking away. 

"It means that I'll be...your family. As long as I live. Which is essentially true, but still-"

Kaladin grunts in surprise as Jasnah hugs him, and widens his eyes before hugging her back, smiling. 

"Thank you, Kaladin. The glyphs are beautiful." Jasnah says, smiling at him, tears threatening to spill out. 

Kaladin blushed, before rubbing the back of his neck, and he then smiles wider, and suddenly Jasnah is taken back to more innocent times filled with joy. 

(Shallan finds an old, weathered paper containing a beautifully drawn pair of glyphs reading _Family_ and _Life_ , in Jasnah's bedroom and takes a moment to admire them, wondering about the identity of the person who drew such simple glyphs beautiful enough for Jasnah to hold dear to her heart, before swallowing.) 

* * *

Jasnah hugs Kaladin at her aunt's funeral, closing her eyes as the child sobs desperately. 

He had comforted Renarin, and put him to sleep as well, before running to the library where Jasnah had been, and had broken down crying. 

And oh, he was just a child, and Jasnah wonders, what broke them all. 

* * *

Kaladin becomes colder and more caustic as the days go by. 

Whenever she sees him, he's littered in bruises and slashes and cuts, and she wants to reach out. 

There's a darkness to his eyes these days- and the fact he looks so like Dalinar doesn't help.

But he's gone. 

Just like her parents. 

She sees less of him, and more of Renarin, who's crying at the arguments and brawls father and son have these days, and Jasnah listens with a growing sadness. 

* * *

She is only comforted when Kaladin walks into the library, holding Renarin's hand with a black eye, grinning as he did as a child and Jasnah hugs them both. 

"What happened?" She whispers softly, pulling back to inspect Kaladin's eye. 

Kaladin's grin wavers, and he shrugs. "It's nothing." He says, ruffling Renarin's hair. 

Jasnah narrows her eyes. "That bravado will not work on me any time soon, young Kaladin." 

Kaladin swallows, and his eyes darken before saddening. "It's nothing." He says firmly, with a strength to those words and Jasnah looks at Renarin in turn. 

"He says he got it from one of the soldiers." Renarin says, timidly. 

Kaladin smiles, and it is weary but genuine all the same, curiously not protesting at Renarin's proclamation of the truth, and frightening clarity rings in Jasnah's brain. 

Renarin was just telling her what his brother had said.

There was no guarantee that Kaladin had been telling Renarin the truth. 

And yet, he had protected. Not fought. 

* * *

Perhaps, the most satisfying moment Jasnah's ever experienced in her life is forming a temporary partnership with her cousin to deal with one Meridas Amaram. 

" _You want to say that again_ , _Amaram, to my storming face?!_ " Kaladin roars one day, in the palace corridor and Jasnah blinks, before seeing angerspren boil at her cousin's feet while Amaram grit his jaw. 

There is a crowd of young teenaged scribes looking at the scene in wonder. 

"Whatever I say is none of your business-"

"It's unfortunate that your face is still as putrid as a corpse, Meridas. Even more unfortunate that you have not been reduced to a corpse yet, it would save us the time of dealing with you." Jasnah calls, hand on hip and Kaladin turns back to look at Jasnah in surprise before nodding slightly. 

Jasnah nods at her cousin. 

"Jasnah. While I believe your greeting could use more courtesy-"

"Oh, like the time you said you would definitely conquer my cousin?" Kaladin drawls, tone dangerous, and all the color drains out from Amaram's face. 

The scribes let out pitying comments, shaking their heads. 

Jasnah raises an eyebrow, anger boiling in her at the slur. "Well, then, I can believe how it is Kaladin's business. You just insulted one of his family members, not that a buffoon as you could ever even comprehend the simplicity of the concept of family. Kaladin, do go ahead and deal with him as you please. Do wash yourself later, I won't have you smelling like the filth that you intend to attack." 

The scribes snicker. 

Kaladin bit on his lip, contemplating it, while Meridas seethed with anger and resentment. 

"You know..." Kaladin smirked. "I do have a duel with him- Shardplate should be enough to protect me from filth, right?"

Jasnah nodded wisely, suppressing a smirk of her own.

The scribes now start giggling and Meridas is looking more and more embarrassed and angry with each second. 

"Well...that question should be answered by analyzing Meridas' Shardplate, don't you think?" Jasnah said, and Kaladin nodded wisely. 

"Yeah. First time I ever pitied _Shardplate_ , storms. Its owner should just drop dead already." Kaladin said, looking at Meridas with a rather bored air. 

Jasnah nods. "I believe there are many patients suffering from lack of air to breathe- if he dropped dead, then certainly, we could save those patients." 

"Definitely. And speaking of waste of air- why are we wasting it on this one? Doesn't he have his secret courtship waiting for him in the stables?" 

The scribes start laughing so hard that tears pour down their cheeks while Kaladin and Jasnah share a secret smile as they walk out of the corridor. 

Renarin however, has only words for expressing exasperation, one hour later. 

"Father and Uncle Gavilar aren't terribly pleased with you two- they want you to see in Uncle Gavilar's study. Did you two have to provoke Amaram of all the people?" Renarin asks reprovingly, folding his arms. 

Kaladin throws his hands up in exasperation. "He was insulting Jasnah!"

"I know. But you should just leave him alone. He'll only convince Uncle Gavilar to make you two apologize to him." Renarin said, narrowing his eyes at the duo. 

"We're not doing it either way." Jasnah says shortly. 

"I won't have you two humiliating an honored soldier-" Dalinar later says sternly, surprisingly not drunk for once while Gavilar pinches the bridge of his nose, and Jasnah bites on her lips actively to suppress a smile at Kaladin's outraged expression.

"He _insulted_ Jasnah! Doesn't that mean anything to either of you?" Kaladin snarls and Gavilar raises an eyebrow. 

Dalinar and Gavilar exchange a look, before sighing. 

"Did he now? He says you two carried out an unprovoked verbal assault while he was inebriated-"

Kaladin sneers. "If he can't even stand a _verbal_ assault, Uncle, how on Roshar is he going to stand an actual assault? And really, inebriated? _That_ was the best he could come up with?" He drawls, raising an eyebrow. 

Jasnah nods. "He does raise a good point, Father." 

Gavilar looks very close to bursting for all of two seconds, then inhales and then waves a hand. "By the tenth name of the Almighty, Kaladin, apologize to the man." 

Kaladin and Jasnah exchange scandalized looks. "You _cannot_ be serious!" Kaladin protests, while Gavilar sighs. 

"Whatever happened- he's willing to apologize to Jasnah. He says he only wants Kaladin's apology."

Kaladin growls under his breath like a chained axehound and Jasnah shakes her head at him, sending him a warning glance. 

"Oh, I'll _apologize_ to him, all right." Kaladin says darkly, his words sounding as if they have been thoroughly bitten on and then spat out, before walking out of the room.

The whole room is silent and suddenly cold, and Gavilar sends Dalinar a _look_. 

Dalinar only shrugs before walking out of the room in a familiar fashion. 

"If that is all, Father." Jasnah says coolly, before leaving. 

Gavilar groans quietly once the room is completely empty. 

Amaram does sport a mysteriously broken nose, which was attributed to slipping and falling off a horse. 

Kaladin has nothing to say in this matter. Neither does Jasnah. 

* * *

Kaladin is more short tempered and irate these days, though his bearing does soften around Renarin and Jasnah. 

Jasnah feels herself more immersed in guilt and weariness every time she and Kaladin argue, however. 

And yet, the young man's righteous instincts serve to annoy Jasnah. 

For Kaladin's part, his cousin's growing coolness guts him, and in it, wounds him to the point his anger bleeds out in front of her. 

It goes too far, ten arguments later.

* * *

"How long has Dalinar been abusing you?" Jasnah asks Kaladin abruptly, and Kaladin looks up from the illustrated book as if stung by an eel, eyes wide before sighing ruefully. 

"Can't keep anything from you, can I?" 

Renarin is sleeping, and it is late night. Salas' light filters in through the window and Jasnah glares at her cousin. 

Kaladin sighs, running a hand through his hair. It is messy, uncombed, let loose and growing longer with each day- any day, it will be longer than Jasnah's, and that was _not_ an exaggeration. 

While Evi had been alive, Kaladin's hair had been neat, combed and cared for. He didn't have bruises covering his face or body or anywhere.

"It's only when he's drunk more than half a barrel. That doesn't happen often. Besides he doesn't hit me directly. He just throws stuff at me." Kaladin explains, finally. 

Jasnah does not know what is worse- the things Kaladin is describing or the matter-of-fact voice in which he is saying them. 

"Kaladin, this isn't right. Would you like Father to have a talk with Uncle?" 

Kaladin chuckles, but it is humorless. "What is _Uncle Gavilar_ going to do? Scold him out of drunkenness?" He asks, smirking dully. 

"Kaladin, this _isn't_ a joke." Jasnah says coldly, nettled at the veiled insult to her father and by Kaladin's underlying nihilism, and the young man shakes his head. 

"It would be funnier if it was. It's not. At least he keeps his hands off Renarin." Kaladin says with a touch of relief in his voice, but the sadness in his eyes is too visceral to be ignored. 

"Kaladin-"

"Drop it, Jasnah." 

Jasnah's _had_ it. Enough was enough. 

Her cousin would not just receive abuse from his drunken father, accept his fate, protect his brother, look after said brother, get himself into fights like a storming fool every other day every time somebody insults _her_ or Renarin, and just tell her to drop it.

_He has no grounds to do so whatsoever._

So she slaps him. 

Kaladin looks up in surprise and hurt, blinking. "Well, that...was sudden." He says, voice deceptively calm, and Jasnah cannot believe the audacity of this child. 

" _Sudden_? You've had it coming for a long time, Kaladin Kholin!" Jasnah hisses coldly, and Kaladin winces, backing up against his chair with widened eyes. 

"You keep getting hurt, you keep insisting it isn't a problem, and then where, from _where_ dare I ask, do you have the _audacity_ to tell me to drop it?" Jasnah continues, angerspren boiling at her feet. 

"Where do you have the audacity to storming _slap_ me for me minding my own storming business?" Kaladin shouts back, and both of them are glaring at each other. 

"Oh, is that so? You have business to attend to, now? You don't just tell me to drop the fact that your father is abusing you!" Jasnah bites out, and Kaladin sneers. 

(This tension between them is nothing new. For months now, Jasnah's feeling frustrated with her cousin and she knows how he feels resentful towards the entire world, and she knows herself a fool for not having addressed it earlier.) 

"Yeah, because no one can dare tell the mighty Jasnah Kholin to do anything, now, can they? My storming apologies!" Kaladin snarls, and Jasnah shakes her head, before leaving. 

"I thought _better_ of you." She says, coldly before walking away, feeling guilty at the satisfaction at the wide eyed look of guilt on his face. 

* * *

"Kaladin?"

Kaladin is furiously practicing with a spear at the grounds and only stops when he sees Jasnah, eyes wide. 

He drops his spear and is trying to talk, and the words stumble out. 

"I'm sorry." He says finally, eyes trembling. 

Jasnah sighs. "I am sorry too, cousin. I was...worried." 

Kaladin rubs the back of his neck- he hasn't stopped doing it since he was a child, she thinks regretfully. "I know." He says softly. 

Nomon is shining brightly, and the cremlings scuttling around is almost louder than her thoughts. Almost. 

"I'm sorry, as I said, Jasnah, but what do you expect me to do?" Kaladin says, looking hassled. 

Jasnah sighs. "You could always tell someone. And what is this I hear of you brawling with the other soldiers?"

Kaladin winced. "That is...admittedly not the best news to be hearing. But, Jasnah, I can explain-"

"You can't solve everything with a punch, Kaladin." Jasnah says simply, and Kaladin freezes, as if someone has struck him. 

The silence is palpable, and Jasnah wills herself not to be guilty at the stricken look in her cousin's eyes. 

"Well?" Jasnah asks, raising an eyebrow. 

Kaladin sighed, gritting his jaw and then sitting down. "I'm just angry." He says softly, and Jasnah bites on her lip, sitting down beside him, worried. 

It's obvious, really. There's a lot he has to be angry about- losing a mother to assassins (though, she is certain that the truth to it is much darker), watching a father neglect and verbally abuse a much beloved younger brother, getting on the wrong end of his father's furious anger, bearing insults from others, watching his father drink himself to his death...

He's clenching and releasing his fists, staring at them with a grit jaw. 

Jasnah just listens, because she can't deal with her own anger and therefore can't tell Kaladin what to do. 

She hugs him, and his eyes are wide but he hugs her back. 

The sleeve of her havah is wet and Jasnah hugs him tighter, willing for all the forces in the universe to not let him get away from her. 

* * *

Her father dies, and Kaladin holds her hand, when they are alone. 

"I'm sorry, Jasnah." He says, and Jasnah bites on her lip. 

"Thank you." 

They haven't spoken for a year now. Kaladin is eighteen now, a man, and Jasnah is twenty nine. But they sometimes hold discussions in the library over great kings, Kaladin's face still bruised despite Jasnah's best efforts. 

The silence between them speaks a league of words, more words than Jasnah's written in a life time, and for the first time he holds her gently, letting her cry softly into the crook of his shoulder. 

"Where is your father?" Jasnah asks softly, and Kaladin lets go, smile dimming. 

"I don't know. Probably off to drink again." Kaladin says noncommittally. 

Jasnah sighs. "Kaladin." 

Kaladin shrugs. "What? It's not so far from the truth."

"And what have I told you about the truth?" Jasnah asks, raising an eyebrow. 

Kaladin rolls his eyes before answering. "Never to assume for the truth when searching for it, because the truth is no more than facts and facts have to be researched duly with due confirmation." 

Jasnah nods, a little glimmer of pride shining in her that he's said it word for word. "There you go. What you find may surprise you."

Kaladin sighs, running a gloved hand through his hair. He's started wearing the uniform staunchly for all of three years, and to see Kaladin out of his uniform is a sight rarer than finding Roshar's moons aligned in a straight line in the same day. "Fine. But if it doesn't, I get to say that I told you so." 

" _Go_." Jasnah says firmly, pushing him. 

Kaladin protests, but eventually walks ahead. 

* * *

"And how is Kaladin?" Jasnah asks to Dalinar, looking at the spanreed. 

_He is well. He asks for you not to get buried in dust._ Come the dry words on the spanreed and Jasnah chuckles. 

Shallan widens her eyes, looking at the spanreed intently. 

_I wish the best for him as well, Uncle. How are you two faring?_ Jasnah writes, hoping for a sliver of good news. 

Dalinar's response is a little halted. _He is no longer glaring at me unless he has a reason, and he is rolling his eyes as I say this._

Jasnah shakes her head with a small smile. _It pleases me to hear this, Uncle._

"Is Kaladin your cousin, Brightness?" Shallan asks, curiously. 

Jasnah nods. "We have been very close since childhood. Though, he and I have varied options on many subjects, he is a good man."

Shallan nods. "I see."

Jasnah looks contemplative even as Dalinar writes to her. "Many people mistake him for his father, though he is a much gentler child at heart." 

"Mistake him for his father?"

Jasnah licks her lips. "In terms of his temperament on the battle field." 

Shallan blinks, clearly not finding this information very comforting. Jasnah shakes her head, choosing to pursue the topic and possibility another time. 

* * *

"I'm getting engaged to _Prince Kaladin_?" Shallan asks, befuddled and slightly scared. 

Jasnah nods, sighing. "I know I have mentioned that the people consider him the second Blackthorn. But he is not so. Just...try to get to know him." She says, trying to assuage the child's fears. 

Shallan bit on her lip. "Okay, Jasnah. I'll try." 

Jasnah sighs again with relief. "That is good enough." 

* * *

"I'm sorry, what?"

Shallan bites on her lip. The man is already intimidating enough by virtue of his reputation alone and with him looming over her like this with blazing blue eyes, it is honestly a miracle Shallan hasn't fainted out of fright. 

"I'm sorry. Jasnah's dead." Shallan manages out, still feeling _wrong_ for saying it so baldly and then Kaladin Kholin freezes, eyes wide. 

" _Oh_." He whispers, and Shallan swallows a growing lump. 

"I...thank you for telling me. And I'm sorry for your loss." Kaladin says quietly, and Shallan nods, hating how with two words, this man has become terribly vulnerable and sorrowful. 

He swallows, and bites on his tongue before nodding stiffly. "I see. I'm sorry, then that we have to meet like this." He says, words sincere and regretful. 

Shallan nods, wishing inexplicably, that she could comfort him. 

Clearly, Jasnah had meant a lot to him. 

* * *

"You can talk about Jasnah to me, right?" Shallan says hesitantly, one day, and Kaladin freezes, blinking at her.

"Assuming you want to?" She prods on, with more confidence, because she knows Kaladin, and Kaladin knows her. 

Kaladin blinks, swallowing a lump. "Really?"

Shallan smiles sadly. "Of course. I know you loved her." 

That night, Shallan cuddles with Kaladin, and Pattern doesn't scream out his usual chaperone call.

* * *

"I think...I think it's a good thing." Kaladin breathes out, looking down with amazement. 

Shallan blinks, and widens her own eyes. 

At the head, is Jasnah Kholin. 

* * *

"Well, not even Damnation could withstand you, huh?" Kaladin greets his cousin, hands in pockets as he smiles at his cousin. 

Jasnah shakes her head. "Theoretically, I didn't even reach the afterlife. So your argument is invalid." 

"Storms, woman." Kaladin says, and Jasnah smiles. 

"Fought with anyone?"

"Scared anyone to death?" 

"If the natural order of events have occurred."

"Considering there's a Desolation post Almighty knows how many millennia, I don't think that's happened." 

"But you still fought with someone."

"Punching Amaram doesn't count."

"You punched Amaram." Jasnah asked, gaze approving. 

Kaladin nodded, rubbing his fist. "Yeah. I washed my fist later, though." 

Jasnah nodded. "A wise decision. Even attacking filth deserves cleaning up." 

Kaladin looked at her. "So you're a Knight Radiant."

Jasnah nodded, looking at him in turn. "You as well, I'm assuming?"

Syl flies around, and Kaladin smiles at her before nodding. "Yeah. Windrunner. You?"

Jasnah smiles. "It suits you. I'm an Elsecaller."

"Well, that leaves me at a disadvantage, considering you know what a Windrunner is, and I don't know what in Damnation an Elsecaller is." 

Jasnah laughs. "Perhaps we could discuss it with Renarin sometime."

Kaladin grins, bright and true. "I'd like nothing else. Welcome back, cousin."

"It's good to be back."

* * *

_King?_

Kaladin's refused it now, but he still doesn't know who else can rule instead of him. He looks at Shallan, uncertain if he's made the right decision or not. 

Shallan taps her chin, contemplative. "Hey. Have you boys ever considered Jasnah?"

Kaladin widens his eyes, frozen for a few seconds before grinning. 

"You don't want to be king?" Jasnah asks him with an arched eyebrow. 

Kaladin shakes his head, gaze serious. "No. I'm not fit to be king. But I know that you are a good ruler. Weren't you the one who told me that one has to be aware of their limitations and be aware of when someone else is more skilled at taking up a certain task?"

Jasnah narrows her eyes at him and Kaladin shrugs. 

"The skill with which you use my own words against me is almost impressive if it weren't so blasted exasperating..." Jasnah says, rubbing her forehead and Kaladin chuckles. 

"Look at it this way, a stupidly idealistic, hot tempered and exasperating young fool won't become king. You will. And I know," His gaze softened and he touched her shoulder. 

"I know that you're the best fit. You're wise enough for it." 

Jasnah looks at him, uncertain for the first time since they met. "I know what Alethkar is losing. It's losing an intelligent," Kaladin snorted. "Decisive, morally right, sympathetic and protective ruler."

" _You're_ intelligent and decisive. Besides, sympathy doesn't work out all the time, like you said. I mean, there are times where we can't afford to lose our morals and kill people just because we can and just because they're being liabilities- we certainly don't have the right to judge that which is priceless. But _you_ have the capacity to do so, cousin. For the good of Roshar, I ask you to be our ruler. We need a capable leader in these hard times." Kaladin said, his words quiet and sincere. 

Jasnah shook her head, smiling slightly. "In that case, I accept." 

"Good. Because I had a contingency plan in case that didn't work out-"

"You never have contingency plans, Kaladin. I know you too well, cousin."

Kaladin rubs the back of his neck with a small grin. "That you do, cousin. That you do." 

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> idk, this felt highly anticipated to me, and i don't know if it meets anyone's expectations or just causes more questions or just marks me as a bad writer lmao
> 
> plus, kaladin doesnt know about jasnah's plan on dealing with the heralds and the listeners- he didnt attend the meeting because he was with elhokar on a siege....if he did, he would have accepted being king. 
> 
> and one more thing, this came to my attention that perhaps Dalinar abusing Kaladin may be a little out of character- it isn't as far as I'm concerned. Now, the thing with Dalinar is, if something scares him or tenses him, his first instinct is to fight. Kaladin being like him scares him. and considering the abuse only started after Evi died, he's drunk to his breeches with no real control over his thoughts. I'll address that in the fic about Dalinar and Kaladin's relationship, so please, don't shoot me till then lmao. 
> 
> also, the glyphpair is with jasnah, XD


End file.
